God’s Voice Within: John’s Reflection II

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I recently observed two people making significant life choices. One was deciding whether or not to move far away from home. The other was trying to figure out whether to change a career.

Both of them would say they are spiritual people. But neither of them seems to believe in the practical aspect of seeking God’s voice for direction.

If spirituality is not practical, then what is it for? And if it is practical in nature, how do we discern God’s voice? How does that voice stand out from all other voices in our heads?

This is the big question that is answered in this book.

 

Practical Spirituality

I have always believed that spirituality can be practical in the sense that we can discern God’s voice (the still small voice, the silent whisper, the pull of the soul) in making decisions that affect our futures. I believe in guidance from “the other side.”

However, I am also well aware of the pitfalls and landmines in believing we can know God’s voice in our complex minds. We are fallible human beings. I recognize the problem of confusing divine guidance with personal bias, stress avoidance, and human desires.

The subject of discernment––inner guidance that leads to our wisest decisions––is not simple. It is indeed maddeningly complex, which is why I read the book God’s Voice Within: The Ignatian Way to Discover God’s Will by Mark E. Thibodeaux.

God’s Voice Within

This book is based on the teaching of St. Ignatius of Loyola, who is one of Christianity’s most important teachers on discernment. Following his advice, what would the two people previously mentioned do to discern God’s will in their decision-making process?

First, St. Ignatius teaches us to begin with a first principle and a foundation for big decisions. It is a statement (not unlike a mission statement) that answers the big questions about the purpose of my life and the purpose of this decision.

Ignatius, for example, chose his own first principle and foundation to be the following: Man is created to praise, reverence, and serve God our Lord, and by this means to save his soul.

Your foundation may be different. You may want to choose a path that increases your faith, hope, love, and closeness to God. Maybe your greater vision is to achieve freedom, or a purpose, or a specific goal. When you start with a clear mission, it will help to guide your decision. But you must first know what you seek.

Should you move across the country? Should you change your career? Well, it depends on what you really want in general. Clarity lays the groundwork for a better decision.

Second, the two people making decisions would use their hearts and their heads. The book suggests we think of possible solutions, dig for data, ask a lot of questions, and do our due diligence. They would then spend time daydreaming to imagine possibilities that aren’t obvious, expanding their list of options.

They would exhaust the capabilities of their reasonable minds.

Beyond Reasonable Decisions

St. Ignatius advises us to imagine a decision made, along with the probable consequences of that choice, and spend a lot of time with it in our minds. And we should then give attention to what we “feel like” in the imagining of this choice.

The person facing a decision to move across the country or to change careers would spend a lot of time “praydreaming”; that is, picturing the path forward and searching the depths of the soul for a feeling of peace or disquiet.

It is this deep knowing that can be trusted, according to the book.

For example, the person who is considering a move across the country will feel predictably stressed, but what is the feeling under that feeling of stress? A person who wants to know God’s voice tries to figure that out.

The one who wants to know what to do about a career can spend time imagining the various possibilities as if the career decision was already made. Is there a sense of peace under the surface noise? Or is there a sense of disquiet? A person who wants God’s guidance will try to figure that out.

God’s voice is present in the depths. It can be found if we ask and listen and develop the skill of discernment in our big life decisions. It can also exist in our smaller everyday choices. But only if we ask, seek, listen. God can be found in everyday affairs.

The Black Cat I Didn’t Want

Is God really concerned about me? Are my small choices really big enough for a creator of the universe? After 60 years on this planet, I’m tired of asking this question.

I don’t know. I used to think I knew the answer: I am surely too small for a personal God to intercede in everyday affairs, but now I’m not so sure of this opinion.

I’ll give you an example.

My wife brought in a black stray kitten when she knew I didn’t want any more pets. I was adamant, firm and inflexible. I loudly told her she had a week to find an owner for it.

I was counting the days, and more than a bit annoyed.  

But then the little black kitten started following me around. His eyes were crusted shut with some kind of disease, but he managed to see me. He didn’t seem to want anybody else. If I was reading in a chair he’d find me. If I moved, he would follow.

Guess where this story is going?

After 3-4 days of this routine, my wife knew she was running out of time. She invited a friend to stop over to meet the kitten. I went to bed early before the friend arrived.

While in bed I felt a heaviness deep within. It was a feeling of remorse, maybe even regret, knowing that my little pal could be gone the next day. This was a strong feeling.

I often feel low or sad or “off” when I need to do something. It seems the negative inner movements get my attention. I feel … burdened at times.

Lying awake in my room, I told myself if he was there in the morning I’d keep him.

He was there. Nobody wants a black cat.

And this unwanted cat has been the most loyal pet of my life. In fact, he is lying beside me on my desk as I type these words (see the picture). That’s my man.

Was the inner turmoil I felt in bed really “God’s voice” telling me to keep the cat?

I’m not sure.

Some will say it was God’s voice, for sure. Others will say it was not, for sure. And they’ll both be sure about something that no human can ever be sure about.

It’s a matter of opinion and a matter of faith.

So what do I believe?

I now lean to the side of the believers.

I trust the knowing when I feel it. And I trust the sense of deep disquiet when I feel that too. These are the green lights and red lights of the soul. They feel like quiet pulls toward or away from an action in a decision.

The Best Option During Intense Stress

A quiet pull of the soul is not a screaming shout. It is subtle. It comes with a sense of peace, not urgency. When the voice in the head is shouting, what to do then?

The Ignatius way is built on the thesis that we must become aware of two distinct states of mind: consolation and desolation.

In consolation, we are filled with a sense of faith, hope, love, and closeness to God. In desolation, we are lacking or somewhat depleted of these same aspects.

In consolation, we feel a deep inner peace, or a rightness, or a knowing; in desolation we feel deeply unsettled and disquiet.

In these times of “desolation,” we are tempted to think irrationally and act rashly to escape the discomfort of unwanted emotions. We are at our worst, not our best. We are desperate to do something––anything––and so we can’t think clearly.

For that reason, we should consider intense emotion as a sign to do nothing.

We forget this one option in every decision: be still and pause. We can wait for our stronger, calmer, wiser selves to return. In times of intense stress or duress, we forget the option to stand firm like a statue, and let the storm pass. And pass it will.

And when we return to our state of mind that is filled with faith, hope, love, and closeness to God, we can then once again search for the true voice within.

The true voice is the one we can trust, and it may even be the voice of God within.

John